It's one year today since my mother died.
She had been moaning, not eating, and out of it for four days. I played soothing music non stop. I stroked her hands and told her it was OK for her to join daddy and her siblings and her dad in heaven. I told her I would be fine, she had taught and loved me well. I dabbed her favorite vanilla and jasmine scented oil underneath her nose. I brushed her hair.
That night she was moaning terribly. I had to put headphones on to sleep. But I swear I heard her gasp in the middle of the night. In the morning, she was gone.
In this year since she passed I have traveled to six countries, am one semester away from being the first in my family to graduate college, and ran my first 10k race. It feels good to let go of the guilt and some of the sadness by taking care of ME. I'm only 26 and can't wait for my life to finally "start". But thinking of spending the next 60+ years without my mom is still devastating.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Friday, October 5, 2012
Introducing Grandma Connie
~Every Girl Loves Flowers~
Introducing my fabulous grandmother, Connie Douglass.
We're in our corner coffee shop with fresh flowers from the Saturday
farmer's market. It's rare that I have a Saturday off from work but when I do, it's off to the farmer's market we go for flowers and Indian samosas (she loves them!). They also have a live band in the plaza. I usually park Grandma in her wheelchair in front of the band while I shop. Then we drink coffee, eat samosas, and listen to the music together.
This 91 year old rockstar grew up in Lewiston, ME. Born to a French Canadian shoemaker and American police officer and bricklayer, she is the oldest of three. At 18 years old she answered her country's call and signed up to be an Army nurse on a war ship picking up wounded soldiers in North Africa and Europe.
She met her future husband on that ship, Tommy Moore, a merchant marine. They wed and had four children (my mother was the oldest) then moved out West to San Francisco, CA for better opportunities. My grandmother joined General Hospital as an Emergency Room nurse and my grandfather drove buses for MUNI, the public transportation system in SF. Here's a funny link to see the love-hate relationship us San Franciscans have with MUNI.
And we've been living in San Francisco ever since!
We're in our corner coffee shop with fresh flowers from the Saturday
farmer's market. It's rare that I have a Saturday off from work but when I do, it's off to the farmer's market we go for flowers and Indian samosas (she loves them!). They also have a live band in the plaza. I usually park Grandma in her wheelchair in front of the band while I shop. Then we drink coffee, eat samosas, and listen to the music together.
This 91 year old rockstar grew up in Lewiston, ME. Born to a French Canadian shoemaker and American police officer and bricklayer, she is the oldest of three. At 18 years old she answered her country's call and signed up to be an Army nurse on a war ship picking up wounded soldiers in North Africa and Europe.
She met her future husband on that ship, Tommy Moore, a merchant marine. They wed and had four children (my mother was the oldest) then moved out West to San Francisco, CA for better opportunities. My grandmother joined General Hospital as an Emergency Room nurse and my grandfather drove buses for MUNI, the public transportation system in SF. Here's a funny link to see the love-hate relationship us San Franciscans have with MUNI.
And we've been living in San Francisco ever since!
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